Time spent...

Thursday, June 24, 2010

It’s me again Blog Followers… ;-)

I wonder if it gets boring to those of my friends who are reading this, to read all of my posts. Are the entries interesting? Are my thoughts coherent?  Are they witty and amusing? Do you enjoy reading my Blog and finding out more about me? Or do you read this just so that you can tell me, “Hey, I followed your blog – Way to go!”?

Regardless of the reason, thank you for taking time out of your busy schedules to spend some time with me and my ramblings!

I am still holding up pretty well as the end of my twenties draws nearer, but I fear I will have a slight melt down a week from today – it will then be July 1st – only 9 days left then… Oh My!

I decided for this entry to review my list of potential topics again and see what stood out to me that I might feel inspired to write about. I think I will talk about some of the things that I enjoy spending time doing.

I have amazing friends and I love to spend time with them. My best friends and “sister” Ashley lives in Nashville, TN, so I absolutely treasure any time I get to spend with her. She will be coming into town for my B-day party and I am super excited about that.


Of course I love spending time with all of my friends and family. Each one is unique and special in their own way and fun to spend time with.

I thought about listing some of my friends with their special qualities, but I love all of my friends too much to risk hurting anyone’s feelings by accidentally not mentioning them. So, suffice to say, I have an amazing bunch of friends and time spent with each and everyone of them is TIME WELL SPENT!

I enjoy reading books and watching TV as well. I also like movies and music. Though, typically I don’t just sit and listen to music. I have it playing in the background while working on something else (i.e. – walking). I like listening to audio books when I drive.


As a kid I devoured books during the summer. I think I read every R.L. Stine novel I could get my hands on and then some. My tastes vary from fantasy to mystery to crime novels to a good old fashioned love story every once in awhile. (Remember folks, I am a girly-girl at heart!) ;-)

This is probably in my profile somewhere, but I’m gonna provide an updated list of favorite TV shows: Royal Pains, Bones, Burn Notice, Friends (all time fave), The Closer, NCIS, NCIS Los Angeles, Ghost Whisperer, Vampire Diaries, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Angel, Charmed, Saved by the Bell (Yes, I used to quote episodes line by line)… Okay, are we over the laughter??????? Moving on… Fresh Prince of Bel Air, The Facts of Life. There are many, many more but I’m to a stopping point because at the mention of several of these shows their theme songs have started running through my head and I don’t need any more themes running on repeat in my head!

My taste in music and movies is just as eclectic as my taste in television. I like variety!

I love spending time with my mom. She is my ultimate best friend. We may have our ups and downs and disagreements – but that is true of every mother and daughter universally. The truth is still that I would be lost without her and love her very much.

As I have said many times before and will continue to say probably to the point of annoying the mess out of you – I AM BLESSED!!! =)

Faith

Wednesday June 23, 2010

Hi ya’ll.

How has your day been? I hope well.

I have had another busy day. I didn’t make it to the gym again today. =( I had too much to do. It’s okay though. I will make up for it.

I went to Bible Study tonight. We had spaghetti for super – YUMMY! With Garlic Bread and salad – delish! =)

We then concluded our study on healing. The main thing about praying for healing is you have to have FAITH TO RECEIVE YOUR HEALING, be diligent in your prayer for healing and be obedient to God’s commands to receive your healing.

These are three somewhat difficult tasks for those new to the Christian life. Sometimes the Faith part is easier, sometimes the diligence and sometimes the obedience. It depends on the individual. For me, all three tasks can be trying at times.

However, I know that the Bible says by Jesus’ stripes I am Healed, so my Faith should be complete in the knowledge that the Bible says I will be healed. (1st Peter 2:24: Who his own self bare our sins in his own body on the tree, that we, being dead to sins should live unto righteousness: by whose stripes ye were healed.” Obedience is difficult for the most part, because I have trouble hearing/feeling God’s voice to know what he wants me to do. Diligence is the hardest for me, for I allow myself to be distracted and forget what I was praying for and/or that I needed to pray at all.

I need to have a Bible Study time and Prayer time set up during the day. Preferably during the morning (except I have been having difficulty rising myself from the comfort of my bed.) I think that would be the best way to start my day though – daily Prayer and Bible Study followed by a good workout! =)

Today was another great today. Just reminded to have Faith and pray for what I need in Faith and with Thanksgiving to the Lord for all of my many blessings.

Just Chatter...

Tuesday, 6-22-10

Another great day as I inch my way closer to the “Big 30!”

Even though I have been tired and a little stressed, it’s still been okay!

I know I am blessed by God.

God is so amazing. Something happened in late April/early May that I felt was by His design. A piece of mail got lost en route from one place to another and I just knew that when God was ready for me to participate in this particular class that the mail would arrive at it’s correct destination. I received a call Monday saying that the envelope had arrived with contents intact and I could be scheduled for my class. I felt God’s hand in this situation and feel blessed that He intervened – I know it was for my benefit.

I have decided to let go of one of my stressors. As much as the motorcycle world means to me, I know that I can no longer be the secretary for the Riders group that I have been participating in at this time. The group is simply too demanding and ungrateful for the time and effort that I have been putting forth. They keep changing things and making demands on my time and finances that I simply can’t meet and keep up with I need to keep with for myself. Simply put, my heart is no longer in it – they drained the life out of it for me. They told me I “must” wear a vest to events. No! If I had a vest, yes I would wear it, but I don’t have the $ to purchase a vest and patches right now, so my presence alone should be sufficient. Their demands of what I “must” wear made it so that I didn’t even want to be at events. I hope this will help me feel better!

Anyway, enough of the fussing…

I had a great afternoon and evening. I didn’t do my workout, but was out shopping and walking through aisles in the stores (some of it a very brisk pace), so I think that counts… At least that’s what I’m telling myself! ;-)

I will hopefully have a chance to head back to the gym tomorrow before Bible Study. We shall see…

6-21-10 Mondays hectic brief thoughts

Another week begins and I’m that much closer to the end of my twenties… *Sigh*

But happy bonus, I’m that much closer to the release of Twilight Saga: Eclipse! Yay!

Today was a truly long day at work. But that’s okay.

I was able to go to the gym today and I worked out for 7 minutes on the Elliptical machine; 42 minutes on the Treadmill and did some ab work! I feel soo good! I even had an opportunity to speak to someone about keeping the gym open later on Fridays, so there will be more time to work out! Yay again! =)

Mom worked out today too! She is doing so good! She didn’t get to work out last week, but still worked out today. I am so proud of her!

I mentioned in yesterday’s blog that my Daddy was into motorcycles. I inherited that love of two-wheeled machines. I love all kinds of motorcycles and hope to ride my own someday. Of course I want mine to painted purple with a smiley face on it. Yes, I know that will make it look incredibly girly and that’s okay with me. I am a girly girl… And purple is my favorite color and I love smiley faces. So a purple motorcycle with a smiley face painted on it would combine three of my favorite things and pay homage to my Daddy – yep, I think that would totally ROCK!

Today on my calendar was a verse from 1st John 3: 18-20 – “My little children, let us not love in word, neither in tongue; but in deed and in truth. And hereby we know that we are of the truth, and shall assure our hearts before him. For if our heart condemn us, God is greater than our heart, and knoweth all things.”

The above verse means to me that we need to not just speak of love, but to show it in how we behave and what we do. We need to reach out for others and to others, be a helping hand when possible. Even if we can’t do much, we can offer a smile and we can pray for someone. What better way to show honest love than to offer up a prayer to our Lord on their behalf?

Hugs and Smiles ya’ll! I hope you are well!

6-20-10 - Happy Father's Day

To my wonderful father whom I love and miss so much ~ Happy Father’s Day!

Happy Father’s Day also to Uncle Charlie, Daddy Lowell, and Daddy Wayne – you all went home to be with the Lord entirely too soon for my tastes. I am sure you are up there having a great big ‘ole party, just waitin on the rest of us to make it up there.

Happy Father’s Day to any and all Dad’s reading this blog. You are all appreciated and loved very much.

This blog is in honor of my Daddy. My Daddy was Lewis Anderson Webb (the first and best). He was a treasure to know with a temper to fear. My Daddy passed away March 11, 2006 and I miss him so very much. Mom and I took him flowers today. One of our dear friends went with us. We also put flowers on Daddy Lowell’s grave – they are both in the same cemetery.

My Daddy was a hero to me. Daddy did so many wonderful things and was a great man. He rode motorcycles, was the Director of Security at ACH, loved to learn and had a heart of gold, especially towards children.

Daddy and Lowell Lemon (my Daddy # 2) were best friends. They went hunting, motorcycle riding and shooting together. Heck, they even worked together. They called each other brother and meant it.

Daddy and Daddy Lowell both loved wolves. Daddy’s longtime nickname was Los Lobo (Lone Wolf) and for a long time that’s what he was. Oh yeah, he had me and mom, but when it came to riding and other activities, he would often go it alone, until he met Lowell, then they were constantly hanging out together and Daddy became less of a lone wolf.

Another nickname of Daddy’s from the motorcycle world was Lil Buddha, which is a nickname I gave to him at an event one Saturday. Daddy was always doing something in the motorcycle community. Whether it was a meeting with whoever he was riding with, or a project for the March of Dimes Bikers for Babies, or Christian Motorcyclists Association, or the American Legion Riders, Daddy always took pride in the work he did for others.

Daddy gave to many organizations and groups of his time and love. He would help as much as possible and in whatever way he was needed. At local events he would help with security and keeping the bikes and those in attendance safe.

Daddy was an EMT and would stop to help anyone who needed help. Including stopping and going back on Hwy 65 when he heard a wreck behind him on the way to Missouri one time. He turned the bike around went back and was assessing the situation and helping the driver of the car that had been hit when the Ambulance and police arrived to take over the situation.

I remember one time, while visiting my grandma’s farm in Missouri before I was even old enough to drive, Daddy letting me drive his truck (a dodge ram charger – big) between hay bales. I told mom that story the other day – she didn’t know it… Apparently that was a Daddy-daughter secret at the time.

The fond memories are the ones I hold onto and cherish the most. The sweet poem/letter he wrote me for my birthday one year. The cards he made on the computer, when he was too busy to go the store. The little things he did to show me that I was his baby girl and he loved me. I had the best Daddy in the world (to me) and I wish he was still here!

He should be here to give me away when I get married and gush over my first child, instead he will be watching over those joyous occasions from Heaven. I keep reminding myself that’s God’s will, but I really think I’m gonna have to ask God “WHY?”, when I get up to Heaven someday! =)

My Daddy was a special a man and I miss him so very much. I visited him and Daddy Lowell today and took them both flowers to celebrate them on Father’s Day. They both took such good care of me and their families.

Those who knew my Daddy, Uncle Charlie, Daddy Lowell or Daddy Wayne were blessed beyond measure, because each was a special and amazing man. I love you all dearly and am looking forward to seeing you in Heaven someday.

Church this morning was very nice. The pastor preached a sermon reminding us that without man, none of us would be here today. God made man first in his image. Wow, we have a lot to live up to, but with God’s help we CAN DO IT!

Men are important – they are our fathers, brothers, husbands, and leaders. They need prayers for strength and guidance from the Lord and they need our love and support. Pray for the men you love for forgiveness and guidance – for God to touch their hearts and lead them in His way, that they might be leaders for their families and be strong in the ways of the Lord.

 

Speaking of my Daddy and our love of motorcycles and motorcycle events. 

Here is a photo taken 'round about 2000 at a Bike Show...  I miss him!

Another Late, Great Night!

6-19-10, Saturday

Today was the third and final day of my church’s convention. Another day of blessings for all involved. This morning we had breakfast, a prayer meeting (my first) and then lunch. The prayer meeting was so amazing. Each pastor was asked to pray for a specific topic and each did so with a heartfelt and faith-filled prayer. Those in attendance prayed the prayer of faith with the pastors and we expect Godly changes in our nation, churches and each other.

It was such an amazing morning.

Then I had a great afternoon and evening spending time with wonderful friends. Thanks to the chefs of the evening who prepared amazing steaks, pork chops, vegetables and baked potatoes. Then fun with kids learning new dance steps… No, they will not be revealed in public any time soon.

We then played a fun game of Scattegories. This is a great game. For those of you not familiar – you are given a letter and 12 phrases. You are on a time limit and have to come up with a word using the letter provided as the first letter of the word that corresponds to the 12 phrases. Some interesting answers were given. I think though, had children not been present, some even more interesting answers would have come forth! ;-)

It turned out to be another late but great night! =) So worth it!

TGIF

6-18-10

After today I have only three more weeks left in my twenties… OH my!

I was talking to a young lady today who is only 28 and has already accomplished most of her “to-do” list. I told her honestly that I am jealous. I still have so much to do!! She said she moves fast… Here we go again – I told ya’ll that procrastinating has gotten me in trouble before… *sighs*

My dear friend, Sis Kris Kris reminded me that Jesus started his work in his 30’s – that’s when he started doing grand things for God’s children. Thank you Sis Kris Kris for the reminder, that maybe it just hasn’t been my time to shine yet… I will get it though… Right?!

I have a pretty bad headache today – have had for most of the day… I am ready for it to GO AWAY! I know God can heal any ailment – I have been praying – I just have to wait – everything in his time! Patience is a virtue.

TGIF - Thank God It's Friday (Or as Sista Sherry says: Today God Is First)!!

Another busy day – busier than I anticipated. It was also the second day of my church’s convention – which was really good! I thoroughly enjoyed it and feel truly blessed by it. Pastor Evoyne Smith was the speaker and she was amazing. Totally enlightening and uplifting. I cried and when I spoke to her after the service, she told me some things that gave me hope and strength.

I am so blessed by God!

She is from Mississippi and brought with her a group called PK Connection – they are her grandchildren and they did interpretive dance to Christian music. They were so moving and filled with the spirit of the Lord. They were such a sight to behold. I feel that all who were able to see them were blessed by their performance.

Another late night, but oh so worth it. It was so special and such a blessing! God is Good.

Let me say that again: GOD IS GOOD ALL THE TIME; ALL THE TIME GOD IS GOOD!!

God is in the House!

I had been planning what to write in this entry off and on throughout the day. Ideas had been occurring, things had been happening and I decided that at the end of the day, I would put it all together and write it out. I got home around 11 pm, sat down in my recliner, played a couple games of Facebook Family Feud and promptly fell asleep. I woke up a couple of times, but not enough to move until around 1am – too late for it to still be the 6-17-10 entry. =( So, once again, I am a day late and a dollar short, but here is my entry anyway…

6-17-10

I experienced another interesting day. It started off not so great. I woke up feeling as crappy as I had gone to bed feeling the night before. That is not good. I prefer to wake up refreshed, headache free and ready for the day. Or at the very least, not as crappy as when I went to bed… Haha! I rarely wake up headache free, but that’s a story for another day.

I went to work and then thankfully was able to spend some time at the gym!! WAHOO!! Gym time was so great. I did 40 minutes on the treadmill and walked a mile and a half. I am feeling so good about that. Then I did some serious ab work. Oh yeah, I FELT IT! =) Then off to the sauna – such a nice treat for myself. A quick shower, then off to church.

My church, Faith in Action, who is part of the Faith In Action Fellowship Ministries is having its annual convention this weekend. Tonight was the opening night. We began around 7:30 pm. What a blessing it was!

The praise and worship and messages given were so moving and encouraging. Immediately following service and prayer we had food and fellowship – another blessing. It is always nice to spend time with other people who believe in and love the Lord like you do.

I’m gonna back up in my day for a moment. While at the gym, I was talking to one of my new friends. She too is a Christian and we were talking about God and his love and listening for his guidance in our lives. It is so amazing to be able to talk about God with near strangers everywhere you go, just because we share a common love for God. God is Good!

The day ended well – in the house of the Lord, surrounded by His love – taking it home with me. I am blessed.

God Loves Me...

6-16-10

Hi everyone!

Did I completely confuse and confound anyone with yesterday’s entry written today? I hope not!

I also hope that I will not make such an error again on the rest of this journey. This is an important project to me, hence the feeling of guilt for not completing and posting an entry yesterday.

Anyway, moving on!...

My horoscope on yahoo read:

“Learn to quietly (but firmly) close the doors to rooms that you aren’t coming back to - - let the past stay where it belongs. You're on the brink of something new, and there's just no need to drag the carcasses of dead and buried situations into them. Let yourself start fresh, and try to see all the possibilities of this brand-new moment. If you're embarking on a new relationship, it's crucial to stay centered in the moment.”

I really like this… It speaks of things that I need be doing - let go, move on.

Today has been a trying day, but thanks to the wisdom, love, support and guidance of my friends (Sister Sherry, Sis Kris Kris and Lil Sis Stormi), I am feeling better. Their words of guidance and encouragement mean so much to me.

All three reminded that when I am at my lowest, God is at his strongest, and that is when I should be turning to him the most. Of course, they also reminded me that I should always rely on God and give everything over to him throughout the course of my daily life, but especially when I am hurting. After all, God is the ultimate healer and comforter.

My sisters were kind enough to remind me that I am special and unique because God made me and God loves me. What more do I need? They are so right! I have the best love in the world – God’s love. And the love of good friends, who will keep me focused on the Lord and where I need to be!

Another day closer to thirty and it hits me, not only am I not where I want to be, what if I’m not where God wants me to be?! I am in so much trouble!

I used the phrase tonite, “I’m trying.” in reference to my relationship with God and knowing who I am in Him – I was reminded it is not a try situation, it is a DO or do not situation. I WANT TO DO!! I want to BE a known Child of the King!

This is not where I originally intended for this blog to go, but it felt right. It’s what was on my heart to be said.

Sister Sherry has on her blog an amazing video that is about God chiseling His child into who he is supposed to be and the child arguing with Him and providing excuses or asking God to slow down… It was soo good. It’s about a 6 minute video – but so worth watching. I was crying by the end of it. It was what I needed to see and be reminded of – God loves me and wants to turn me into the image of His son that He sent to die on the cross for my sins.

I also heard a great song tonite – my mom has been telling me about it, so I googled it. It’s sang by Amy Grant and called “Better than a Hallelujah.” It is a beautiful song! I really liked it!

I AM LOVED! God made me and He loves me – I am His masterpiece! That means I am special and beautiful and deserve to be treated as such.

Thank You God for blessing me with amazing friends and family to help guide me back to You!

A day late...

6-15-10

So after comments from two of my dear sisters on my Facebook status, regarding feeling terrible about not writing a blog yesterday, I will be writing two today! =) Thanks y’all!

This is the first one; we are going to call it “The tragedy that is procrastination and forgetfulness …”

When I was trying to determine yesterday what to write about, I looked at my calendar and liked the verse that was presented there, Luke 9:62: “And Jesus said unto him, No man, having put his hand to the plough, and looking back, is fit for the kingdom of God.”

The verse I just quoted is from the KJV (my usual preferred version), however the calendar quotes from a version called The Message and it reads “No procrastination. No backward looks. You can’t put God’s kingdom off till tomorrow. Seize the day.”

I think the KJV is prettier, however The Message brings the point home. Procrastination is one of my big downfalls sometimes, as is looking back. I look back at my life and wonder what I could have done or said differently (as mentioned in a previous blog).

Procrastination used to get me in trouble in school. I was forever waiting until the last minute to write papers and complete projects. I have grown out of that to a degree, but sometimes, to my great dismay, I let things cloud my brain and end up procrastinating still.

The other verse I considered writing about yesterday was one posted on Facebook posted by one of the aforementioned dear sisters… Numbers 6:24-26 reads “The Lord bless thee, and keep thee: The Lord make his face shine upon thee, and be gracious unto thee: The Lord life up his countenance upon thee, and give thee peace. And they shall put my name upon the children of Israel; and I will bless them.” These verses are my confirmation that God intends to bless us all. I knew that already, as I am greatly blessed. But I love seeing it in black and white that God is going to bless his Children! Yay!

Part of the reason I didn’t write yesterday was that I didn’t have time and part was that I wanted to write after I got home. Then I got home late and straight up forgot.

On to the forgetfulness part of this tragedy – I AM ONLY 29 YEARS OLD!! I should not be this forgetful!! But sure as anything, if I don’t write something down, I will forget it. I have to write things in my calendar and make sticky notes galore… Even then sometimes, I still forget. =(

I know to a degree, this is natural, but it is such a bummer for me. I hate that feeling of knowing there is something I need to be doing or something I should have done, but I just can’t quite remember what it was. It is so FRUSTRATING! I think, okay, I can remember that just for a few short hours, until I get home, then I get home and it doesn’t cross my mind again. Or if it does occur to me, it is in the form of a fleeting thought, “hmm, there was something I needed to do – what was it?!” I’m not sure which is worse – both are incredibly frustrating and make me feel foolish. My mom says “you’re too young for that.” Well yeah, that’s the way I feel too. But what can I do to fix it?

Here’s a great example – I thought I was finished with this blog – until I was reading back through it and realized I had completely forgotten to write the forgetfulness part. Really?! Are you kidding me?! I just wonder, “What the heck is going on in my head sometimes???”

Okay, now I will consider myself done with that topic and ready to back track a bit, but also move on… Yesterday, I wanted to wait to write my entry, because I wanted to be able to include the fact that I worked out again! I am so proud of myself for going back to the gym after missing Monday…

I walked 1.5 miles on the treadmill in 40 minutes, and worked out my abs! I was feeling so good! =)

Okay, that’s enough of this entry… Moving on to today! =)

I have been so busy today I didn't have time to write my blog. *Gasp!*

I didn't even have time to work out, but thanks to the encouragement and support of my friends I don't feel as bad about it as I did at first!

I love my family, friends and the Lord! I am so blessed with amazing family and friends!

Todays Message...

Church today was great. The message was quite thought provoking.

The verse we read from was II Timothy 1:6-9:
“Wherefore I put thee in remembrance that thou stir up the gift of God, which is in the by the putting on of my hands. For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind. Be not thou therefore ashamed of the testimony of our Lord, nor of me his prisoner: but be thou partaker of the afflictions of the gospel according to the power of God; Who hath saved us, and called us with an holy calling, not according to our works, but according to his own purpose and grace, which was given us in Christ Jesus before the world began…”

The prayer my pastor suggested and that stuck with me was:
“Lord cleanse my mind and get the clutter out!”

I like this prayer and this line of thought – we are told in the Bible that God provided us with the spirit of power, love and of a sound mind. That sounds wonderful to me. Often times I get distracted and forget what I was going to say, or what I was going to a different room for.

These verses and today’s message gives me comfort in knowing that through God and prayer I have the power to claim a sound mind free of clutter and forgetfulness.

God is SO GOOD!

Today was an all around a good day in a weekend that has been too short! Lunch and Best Buy with mom and a good friend. Lonestar steakhouse on Rodney Parham is good food and great service!

Got a text from my sister last night as she was having a blast at the CMA fest in Nashville…. Yes, I’m jealous, but I’m glad she was out there having a great time.

She said I should join her next year… I think I should too! =)

I’m not loving the fact that Sunday is almost done, and I have to go back to work tomorrow… I am a firm believer that we should have four (4) day work weeks and three (3) day weekends! Who’s with me?

So far so good, on a fun journey to the end of my twenties…

See ya tomorrow for another entry!

Hugs & Smiles and thanks to those reading my ramblings! ;-)

Thirty to My Big 30! - Fun Day!!

Today was a great day!

I started the day with a pedicure and a glass of White Zinfandel. Rumors Salon is great! Ms. Kristen is so awesome!

 I went to lunch with mom at Zaxby’s (my first time there) and it was really good!

We then went shopping and I found two dresses that I really like… I was super excited because they are a size smaller than what I used to wear and they fit!!! And looked cute! No, I didn’t purchase – just seeing what fit! =)

Then, we were off to find sandals…. No joy. =(

I finally found some black tennis shoes, but still no sandals! I’m bummed, but will keep looking... Suggestions are welcome!

My day ended with dinner with a friend at Shot Gun Dan's pizza (YUMMY!!) and great service!  Then we walked part of the Big D Bridge (he couldn't handle walking the whole thing...) It's okay!  It was nice, but there were waayy too MANY bugs!!  I am not a fan of bugs!

This is a short entry… Just wanted to say I had a good day working my way to thirty! This is gonna sound goofy, but my mom is so great. I love hangin with her! =)

Glory to God for a blessed and joyful day!

“What If?!”

So, I thought I was doing better with the turning “30” thing… Then a coworker called and left me a voicemail saying “hey thirty year old,” when I still have almost a month left… Ugh! =) The one that really got me though, was before that when a friend said, “oh, that means your three decades old.” I thought I was gonna cry!!!! That just sounds harsh!!! I couldn’t believe he told me that. Anyway, it’s okay to laugh – I can laugh now. =)

One of the things on my “list” that I want to talk about is “What If” Syndrome… This is where we as humans constantly ask ourselves “What If?” What if I had done this differently? What if I hadn’t said that? What if I had never met him? What if I had been better?

For some of us, as we age that list of “What If” questions seems to get longer and longer. Others seem to know how to let it go and not worry about the “What Ifs” in life. After all, we can’t go back and undo and redo things as much as we would like to!

I often think about the “What Ifs” of my past and wonder how different things would be if only I could go back and change the things that I regret. I imagine that my life would probably be hugely different than it currently is. If I could go back and undo the things that I wish I had done differently, unsay the things that shouldn’t have been said, take back the words, gestures and actions that forever changed the course of my life, I would probably be in a completely different place.

Would I be happier? I don’t know. I think about the things that I would possibly lose if I could go back in time and “fix” things. Would I still know the amazing people that I currently know and love? Would I have gone to college and met the amazing people I met there? Would I have my current job? Would my daddy still be alive? (That one gives me pause and makes me think it almost might be worth it, just to see if I could get daddy to stop smoking, eat healthier and live many more years…) But then I come back to myself and I know that I wouldn’t necessarily get to keep the knowledge I have now if I could go back to points along the timeline of my life and make repairs. I have come to the realization that as much as there are things that I regret (and have tried to make amends for) and people I wish were still with me that aren’t (death sucks) and things that would be nice if they could be done over again, it’s okay that I can’t fix those nagging “What Ifs” of my past.

Those little questions that pop up (sometimes at the most inopportune times) keep me grounded. They remind me to live my life to its fullest. To try to live the life that God wants me to have – to do things for me that make me happy. To try to live the next thirty years so that when I am reflecting on them at (oh Lord help me) age sixty, I won’t have as many “What Ifs” floating through the recesses of my mind. When I get there I will have happy memories to reflect on with a heart full of love and joy and know that I did what God wanted me to do!

Proverbs 3: 5-6 says, “Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge Him, and He shall direct thy paths.”

James 1: 5-6 says, “If any of you lack wisdom, let him ask of God, that giveth to all men liberally, and upbraideth not; and it shall be given to him. But let him ask in faith, nothing wavering. For he that wavereth is like a wave of the sea driven with the wind and tossed.”

I glean from the above two verses that I need to put all my faith and trust in God and ask him for the guidance and knowledge I need to live the life I want to have. He will provide the answers that I seek – if only I ask with a believing heart. I can do that!

According to Psalm 73:24 “Thou shalt guide me with thy counsel, and afterward receive me to glory,” therefore, I believe it is in my best interest to follow the will of God – He will guide me and for following His Will, He will bring me unto Him. That’s what I’m working towards – happiness on earth through God and happiness in eternity with the Lord and my family who have gone before me.

One book later and I’m done with today’s entry… Sorry it’s such a long one ya’ll! 
Please check out the following site: Pray for America

Lists...

In considering what to write about today, I began thinking about things I like, things that make me think, things I want to accomplish in my next “thirty” years and the things going on in my life right now that I think are cool.

So that I will continue to have topics to write about as I continue on this journey, I am going to break that list down and pick only one item for today. The thing is, the more I think about that list, the more it just GROWS! Not only the items underlying each main topic, but the list of topics themselves continues to grow also, including one that just occurred to me – things I am thankful for (which is a borrowed topic, from the colleague that I borrowed the whole idea from), but anyway – I give credit where credit is due! =)

Now that I have this incredible list of items to choose from – I have to decide! Wow! That may be more difficult than I anticipated. As I’ve made the list it has occurred to me, that some of the items should be reserved for specific days over the coming weeks, so I have made little notations, to the side of those with a date.

It’s funny, the more I think about the list, the more the list itself seems to be becoming the topic of today’s blog. LOL! =) Case in point, the list is now longer than this blog!

Okay so it just hit me – LISTS! We all make them for many different reasons to accomplish a variety of tasks. Where did this phenomenon start? Why do we feel the need to categorize our lives so much?

We have lists for everything! Shopping lists, to-do lists, honey-do lists, packing lists, check off lists and more… Santa has a list of naughty and nice tykes.

Even our Heavenly Father has lists. He keeps a list in the Lamb’s Book of Life consisting of the names of His children who will be admitted into Heaven. (I want to be on THAT LIST!) He provided Moses with a list of Commandment’s for us to follow. (Exodus 19:25, 20: 1-17)

Lists are and seem to have always been a part of our daily lives. It’s just something we deal with I guess. Many days I am glad for the ability to write a list – it helps keep me on track (when I remember to check and follow the lists I have written). Ha!

Lists are great! They have helped provide me with a great topic for today, one where I can even give Glory to God and reference the Word, which is nice. It has helped me with one of my goals of daily Bible Study. Now, I just need to do better about spending time with the Lord and the Word daily – I’ll add it to my list! ;-)

Have a great day ya’ll – go make your list and check things off as you get them done!!

Let the Countdown Begin

June 9, 2010

Greetings,

Well ya’ll it’s happened…

The countdown has begun… It is officially “Thirty Days To My Big 30!” Pray for me?!

Really, I think I will be okay. Friends have told me that I will survive this day as I have all of my other birthdays, but this one is just really freaking me out.

I guess the truth is that I’m not where I expected to be at this point in my life. Don’t get me wrong, I love my family, friends and all of the blessing of my life, but there are things that when I was younger I had expected to have accomplished by this “Milestone Birthday…”

There are many things that I had planned to have done or in place by the time I was 30 and those things are still somewhere in the wind or in the back of my mind as part of my perpetual “To-Do” list…

One of the major things that is different from my expectations, is that I fully expected my Daddy to still be here to celebrate this milestone with me. Many of the things on the afore mentioned list were things that he was supposed to be here for as well. I am blessed to still have my mother here with me for these special times and for that I am truly grateful. She is awesome and I love her dearly, but I still miss my Daddy very much and wish he was here.

So, for the next thirty days as I countdown to my Big 30, I will try to include activities that he would have enjoyed and honor his memory. As he watches from above, he will know that in my heart, he is celebrating with me during the coming month and most especially on my “big” day… I still have in a safe place a letter he wrote to me many years ago on one of my birthdays. I will carry that letter and it’s sentiment with me on this journey.

As I progress through the next thirty days I will write an entry a day (maybe two) it depends on what's going on.  I will update my facebook status with the link as a reminder to everyone, to check out my Blog!

I am excited and terrified at the same time.  God has a plan though and I just have to be patient as He walks me through His plan for my life and see what happens next.

On the days when I don't know what to write about, I will look to my daily Calendar Quotes for inspiration...

Today's quote is: " 'It's a God thing.'... As if anything isn't.  Sunrises are God things, air is a God thing, coffee is a God thing.  Chocolate, music, hot baths, great friends, autumn evenings, Dippin' Dots ice cream, cloud formations-I believe that they are all pretty much 'God things.' "

Okay, so I love that quote, because indeed - everything is a God thing.  He is what keeps us going and sets us free.  This is going to be a good month and 30 is going to be an amazing year!!!

Let's get this party started!! ;-)  Have a great day all!